I went into 2020 feeling rather hopeful, anticipating what this 20/20 year was going to bring. It started out like any other year - a routine of work, family time, social gatherings, parties was quickly established. Besides the global events taking place around the world in Jan/Feb, I remember the pace at work starting to pick up and we made a short trip to Hanoi (short = two days). I remember being surrounded by passengers wearing masks strapped tightly to their faces on the plane. Didn't expect that to be the last plane ride I took before everything became a blur.

It's undeniable that the pandemic had completely taken over 2020. I can hardly recall the events following Chinese New Year in chronological order besides some important moments (I want to caveat that these highlights are stark to me and do not represent the opinions of anyone else): 

• Organising ourselves and adjusting to the new normal (i.e. moving important things to work from home)
• Dalgona coffee and other trends (that I did not jump on)
• Supermarket runs and things (toilet paper and whatnot) flying off the shelves whenever PM was about to make a televised broadcast
• His pink shirt (or whichever colour the public was predicting he would be clad in)
• His teacup - the one that allowed him to switch to speaking in another language
• Going out for work (and feeling scared about it)
• Zoom workouts every Saturday at 1500hrs
• The putting-on-a-top-while-doing-a-handstand trend (ok I admit this I did try)
• Visits to the hospital (I always say the most dangerous place is often the safest)
• GE2020 (imo Mothership did one of the best daily sum-ups)
• Sending food/drinks to friends' houses (now I have a collection of addresses!)
• The start of veganism 
• My best friend giving birth, and my godson being born!!!
• Daily Skype meetings (without camera)
• House Party (the app/game)
• WhatsApp calls with my friends in the middle of the day
• Cooking (vegan food)
• Skin detox (no make up for weeks!)
• Nightly texts with a then-penpal 
• Receiving face masks from the government (vending machines one inclusive)

I'm proud to share that I did not look at my archives on Instagram Stories for this list, mainly because I barely took any from April to June : )

I'm glad my European adventures didn't stop in 2017 because this year, I planted a big red pin on the home of one of the world's greatest architecture, works of art and of course, gastronomy - Italy.


After visiting eight towns/cities in Northern and Central Italy, I'd say that the Italian way of life is dreamy, stylish and burning with passion (just my view alone so tell me if you beg to differ). It's difficult to pinpoint a favourite town/city because they're each so unique in their own ways and I thoroughly revelled in the different experiences that they had to offer.

A few lessons to take away before I delve into my itinerary (please learn from these silly amateur mistakes):

1. Pack light (okay kinda difficult if it's winter and you're afraid of the cold - I brought THREE coats) because the cobbled walkways are terrible for the wheels on your luggage.
2. If you can, rent a car and DRIVE!! Catching trains with a suitcase weighing 20kg is something you'd want to avoid.
3. Always put your damn bag pack or sling bag (I would seriously advise against a handbag) in front and hold on to it when you're walking or sitting or chilling or idk just hold on to it seriously.
4. If you're not on a budget, BUY ALL YOUR TRANSPORT TICKETS and I mean do it even if you have to stuff money into the bus driver's hands.
5. Give yourself extra time in case pubic transport fails on you with the very commonly experienced Italian train delays.
6. There's a difference between a Metro station and a train station. A lot of difference.

Our 2-week itinerary:
Venice > Lake Como > Parma > Levanto > Cinque Terre > San Gimignano > Florence > Rome

The Venice I visited was not flooding (thank goodness, on behalf of my spankin' new Zara boots) and although it was still packed with tourists, it wasn't half as bad as the crowds during peak travel seasons.


It was rather easy to get around (by foot so you can accumulate those steps) but if you're done walking just get on the Vaporetto, the equivalent of a water taxi. I'd say it's pointless to spend 100 euros on a 30-min gondola ride because the views from the Vaporetto isn't much different. But I mean, it still sounds romantic to shimmy down the canals with someone serenading Italian songs in a raspy voice...




We spent two nights in Venice and found time to take a day trip to Burano (popular for its lace products) and Murano (for its pretty Venetian glass), both a short Vaporetto ride away. Again, I emphasise on the importance of buying the transport ticket (go for the day pass)!!

Tip: the Venetian glass accessories were cheaper in Venice than in Murano so don't splash all your cash on the small island.




We took four train rides to get to Bellagio, one the main towns surrounding Lake Como, much to my mom’s dismay. I planned for us to stay for one night only but on hindsight, I'd recommend increasing that to at least two nights in summer because of the water sports you can take part in by the lake.


The. Views. Are. Literally. Breath-taking. But there's a price to pay for that... If you're not staying in the main town, you're probably going to stay up in the mountains (like we did) so I'd recommend renting a car because it's hella difficult to get up there. We took a 15-minute cab ride (~60 euros round trip) up to our Airbnb and had to climb 2 flights of very narrow stairs to get to the main door. There was also nothing around our house so we had to do our shopping before calling for a cab. So yes, we actually took 4 train rides and a cab to spend one night in a swanky house on a hill with a gorgeous view of Lake Como (only in the morning when the fog cleared) - something my mom seriously did not agree to. She exclaimed that she should've vetted my itinerary. Do spend more time around the lake if it's part of your plan. Trust me, it’s very worth it!

Our next stop was Parma, a town in the Emilia-Romagna region and also one that's lesser known than it's "big brother" Bologna. Parma is known for, no prizes for guessing, its prosciutto di Parma and parmigiano reggiano. Of course I HAD to have a meal made entirely of just ham and cheese... I also had their house wine called Lambrusco (carbonated wine).


Because February is a low season, a lot of shops weren't open and the town was pretty quiet - perfect for taking countless of pictures without having to edit the crowd out of the background.



Imagine strolling down the already-dark streets at 7pm after an early dinner; it may be kinda cold but you feel warm inside because of the satisfaction from a good meal and tasty wine. This is why I enjoyed our one-night stay - I'm a fan of the slow, laidback holiday but I read that many people take a day trip out to visit Parma and/or Bologna from Milan instead.

I chose to base us in Levanto to visit Cinque Terre because we were coming from up north. BUT I didn't know that we had to go down south and transit at La Spezia before going through all 5 villages of Cinque Terre to finally arrive at Levanto (lmao). We could’ve saved some time if we were based in La Spezia instead. However, that also turned out to be a blessing in disguise because being morning-people, we headed out bright and early from Levanto and started at Monterosso before ending our visit in Riomaggiore. Most people start off where we ended instead so we definitely caught a bonus there!



Anyway, because it was a low season, the villages were really quiet. Only a few shops were open and those that were close mostly said, "be back in March". Sigh, give me the Italian lifestyle of taking a long-ass, well-deserved winter break anytime. Regretfully, winter also meant that the hiking trail across all five villages were shut for repairs. I was devastated because I was looking forward to the hike but of course, my mom rejoiced in that fact hahahaha.





Nonetheless, we bought the day pass so we could take the trains from Levanto and in between the 5 villages of Cinque Terre anytime (kinda like a hop-on-hop-off). I'd suggest to pack light but bring some snacks and water for the day trip if you ever go during this period because I bet you'd be hungry af from all the walking (even without trudging through the trail). I don't think I relished the full experience of Cinque Terre because I always thought being there in the summer when it's all hot, humid and crowded would be most ideal. Also because I love jumping off cliffs in my bikini hahahaha. But even so, I'd say that all 5 villages are unique in their own ways although some, in my opinion, are "prettier" than others.

Our next stop was San Gimignano, a UNESCO World Heritage Site also known as Italy's Medieval Manhattan because of the 72 towers built by the patriarch families to display their wealth in the past. Although only 12 of these towers remain, they retain that raw, rustic look and rise up way above the Tuscan landscape.


Most people base themselves in Florence and take a day trip out to the Tuscan countryside, visiting smaller towns like San Gimignano and Siena. My ambitiousness to break away from city-living meant that we did just the opposite - we spent 2 nights in San Gimignano and visited Florence from there instead.



Our "apartment" was part of an old castle so it was rather dark and the heating wasn't great. However, our Airbnb host was wonderful and so passionate about his hometown he gave me a translated book on its history which I spent my nights there reading.

I remember taking a one-hour bus ride to Florence on a very cold morning but we were instantly perked up after downing a shot of coffee and doing some souvenir-shopping in the main market of the city.


Unsurprisingly, Florence was packed with throngs of tourists - you can hear all sorts of languages in the air and of course those bright, ugly flags being waves around on top of bobbing heads. My mom and I really enjoyed the overall vibes of this (yet another) UNESCO World Heritage Site, especially with the Renaissance architecture at every turn. I'm a huge, huge fan of near-bird's eye views so I really loved Piazzale Michaelangelo. Beware of the short but steep hike you have to make to get up there (or you could just take a bus) but it's very doable.



We had a very unpleasant encounter when we left Piazzale Michaelangelo - we got scammed by the bus conductors and his cronies.

Lesson well-learnt: if the bus driver signals for you to just sit down when you ask him how to purchase the bus ticket, DO NOT sit down without paying. Insist on purchasing the bus ticket - idk, stand there and harass him until he takes the money. Not having a ticket when the bus has started moving will cost you 50 euros and you really don't want that to happen. Despite that and the tourist crowd, I really liked Florence. On hindsight, perhaps spending two full days there would be more ideal.

Our final leg of the trip was spent in Rome and I'm quite convinced that the noise, the vibrancy and the ruins are all part of the city's charm. It's a big place and its popular sights stretch beyond the city centre so remember to get an accommodation near a metro station. Our Airbnb was situated right outside the Vatican City so it was quite a journey to explore the area around the Colosseum and other museums.



My mom isn't a huge fan of the artsy stuff so we skipped many snaking queues but instead, wandered slowly around the sights and pounced on every opportunity to take pictures. We tried a lot more Italian cuisine in Rome too, simply because everything was open despite it being winter. It was more crowded than Florence but I think that's how it is (can't and don't want to imagine what it'll be like during the peak seasons though).




We got pick-pocketed on a public bus outside of the Vatican City just as we were wrapping up our second last day. It was partially my fault because after being in very quiet towns for the past one week, I seriously let my guard down even in this notorious Roman city. But I insist that I should not be blamed entirely because YOU AREN'T SPSED TO BE TAKING THINGS THAT DON'T BELONG TO YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE. It was very unfortunate, but I'm glad we weren't harmed in the process.

If I could, I would spend a week just in this city alone because I think Rome has so much to offer. Of course, I would also like to be back again just to refresh (and replace) my initial impression and memory of the place.

After being the target of an unfortunate scam AND pick-pocketing, I was very much looking forward to going home to Singapore where it’s safer on so many degrees. But on our last night, I sorely regretted that thought because tbh, the past two weeks were absolutely wonderful:

A cup of caffé kicks off the early morning, followed by a few hours of the intended exploration of gorgeous architecture and art, before we sit down at a café under the afternoon sun in the cold with a glass of rosé and a plate of parma ham for lunch. The exploration and picture-taking (without selfie-sticks) continues again, and before we know it,  we’re in the queue outside a gelato shop for a piccolo with two scoops of dark chocolate and pistachio. We also stop by a dessert shop known for its tiramisu, and wolf it down in 2 bites each right outside. Dinner is a three-course meal including homemade and pipin’ hot tagliatelle al ragù, not complete without a small jug of wine each (I finish my mom’s one for her) and then we take a long stroll back to our apartment (or the bus stop). Of course, the day includes my terrible navigation skills (in my strong defence, the compass of my Google Maps guides me to the wrong direction), my broken Italian (that sounds more like Spanish) and my plastered, pleasant smile (to both charming strangers and rude shopkeepers).


I don’t know about you, but I definitely can get used to that life.

I’ll be back – this time still with a suitcase weighing 20kg but with a rented car to drive thru Rome, as well as the South.

It’s not just the idea of being on holiday without the burdens of a job and work that excites me. Italy itself is a rough, uncut but still sophisticated gem where art and life meet at the crossroads so effortlessly.

It truly is la dolce vita.

I turned 24 thinking what a shit year it has been. The most part of it was feeling greatly deterred by the inability (and unwillingness) to adapt to working life and of course among other things, the usual affairs of the complicated organ that keeps us alive: the heart.

I spent most of the year feeling sorry for myself, wondering why I haven’t achieved what I set out to achieve. I ask myself aloud why this year hasn’t been going where I expected it to, when it was meant to be mine, but wasn’t (and isn’t). There was a lot of self-doubt: am I who I think I am? Do I need to go through that whole tirade of “finding myself”? Then there was the self-loathe: thinking and knowing that i’m far from what I envisioned myself to be when I’m 24. How I’m not good enough for myself, and for other people. That I’m bad news.

I guess I’ll never really know when I started feeling this way about myself. I exuberate confidence and happiness and positivity — yes, this is all me. I love me like that. But of course I have my moments and these are the moments I truly relish in. It’s not like I have a mask on all the time, but I’m sure you understand what it’s like to want to be really glum and moody. Hell, I’d like to throw a tantrum in front of someone once in a while.

So, after all the ups and the downs the past year, I’ve realised that I just don’t love myself enough.

In a perverse way, I think feeling the ache in my heart beats feeling nothing at all so I’d rather hang on to every bit of that sadness because besides that, I really don’t remember how to feel anymore. And if I don’t know how to feel, it means that I have truly lost it forever. Sounds like a real sick way of coping if you ask me.

And now, my brain is rational: if I’ve lost it, then so be it. I don’t want it back because I’m tired of the sadness that comes along with it. Also because I know how much it aches those who love me to see me hankering after something that isn’t good for me.

Ok, I’m awake. I feel more awake than ever.

There are so many other things to worry about in life. Bills, for one (or many) — man these letters really don’t stop coming in the mail do they? And of course one of life's greatest mystery: “finding my passion” — a real struggle but I truly believe that we have the ability to change things with the right resolute, resolve and support. I'll admit I also worry about growing up and growing old without making a difference in this world. This, you can say, is my greatest fear in life and also a problem I doubt I’ll ever have an absolute solution to besides to keep trying and trying and trying.

And of course, there are the people who have always been there to thank. I used to wear my heart on my sleeve — I'd throw around the "I love yous" very casually (but of course I meant all that I said then). As I got older, I tell the people who love me that I appreciate them so much less than I did before. So I hope you know how grateful I am to you for being a part of my life. Y'all know I'm sentimental af.

At 24,
I want to be more ballsy in taking up challenges and seizing the right opportunities. I want to take the plunge with risks and not be afraid of failing. I want to be courageous and brave. I want a bigger and stronger heart. 

I finally had the time to watch this Netflix hit (at the expense of only 4 hours of shut-eye just the night before) and I'm impressed!!! It doesn't take much to impress me (yes, really) but I loved everything about this movie. Fine, it still is a chick-lit-turned-teen-romance-flick and I can never imagine a similar scenario actually playing out irl but a girl's allowed to dream!

Now I wish I'd written love letters to the boys that I've loved before...

... even if I have, they wouldn't be sent out.

But I made a playlist.

Watching this movie reminded me a lot of a playlist I created on Spotify quite a while ago (inspired by a good friend). It's my rendition of the soundtrack of love - for before it starts, to after it ends.

Love - I'm not sure I even know what it is anymore. But I remember it creeping up quietly and I gotta to admit, it was beautiful and I miss it, very much. Sure, it was painful too but sometimes I guess we have to let some people go even if we love them.

Every song reminds me of a specific feeling I've felt/feel towards someone I love/used to love.

(Best listened to in the order organised.)