I left exactly a month ago and there's not a single day that I don't miss home. For someone who's been protected and sheltered her entire life, venturing into completely foreign places is not an easy feat. It's true that the hardest part will always be the goodbye (all those tears), but the feeling of unfamiliarity and the fear of not knowing where you are can be pretty intimidating.

Here's a shoutout to each and everyone who came to the airport on a weeknight to bid me farewell as I head off on the adventure of a lifetime. I don't think I'll ever be a perfect friend (I'm not the best at replying texts or sending 'how are you' messages at random) but all of you know how much you mean to me :') I will come home more independent and 'less-blur'!!

In the past month I've realised how extremely tiny I am in this world (let's not even go to the relative-to-the-universe part...). But seriously, the world is HUGE. I mean it's not the first time I'm outside of Singapore or outside of Asia but the mountains are truly endless and the horizons stretch out so far you might feel that you can see the curvature of the earth. It's that crazy. It's also that amazing. 

Asia is beautiful. So is Europe. The entire world is if you only care to look! I travelled without a local SIM card or data so most of the time I walked around with offline Google maps or actual physical maps. True I felt slightly insecure without the connectivity but it really allowed me to be more aware of my surroundings and I'm thankful for that. What I saw with my eyes (and perhaps my cameras too) was beyond what I can describe as mere beautiful. If you have me on Snapchat, you'd realise I captioned every bloody scenery as "gorgeous" (ugh that limited vocab). Imo they were all really gorgeous!!!!! What I do whenever I'm overwhelmed by an amazing scene: take a huge breath (the air is very fresh most of the time), close my eyes and capture the scene, and save it to my memory. I love just standing there staring into all that beauty and thinking about everything and nothing all at once. Those moments are truly priceless (okay maybe not in the cost sense but you get what I mean).

After one month in Eastern Europe, I MISS ASIAN FOOD. I steered away from anything close to noodles or Chinese spices in the first half of the month (ask Daryl I always got annoyed when he wanted to eat Asian food) because I mean, I've had Asian food my entire life (sorta) and I'm in Europe now. My exchange-motto: EAT THE PEROGIES AND THE DUMPLINGS AND THE PASTRIES SILLY. Oh god don't even get me started on the dumplings. Google "European dumplings" they are definitely not the same as the dumplings we have back home (omg I miss dumplings). I've had so much (and I really mean a lot) of potatoes that I shy away from it at the grocery store this afternoon. Watching all your snaps of charkwayteow and carrot cake (Asian version) and hokkien mee and salted egg yolk (!!!!) makes me want to cry (figuratively). Coming to Europe has made me appreciate the extremely wide variety of local food we get to choose from for our daily meals. They're definitely not big on variety of food here (think: every other restaurant sells the same few dishes). Anyway, food here isn't that bad. I love eating, so I will definitely survive hahahaha. 

I've also realised the true efficiency of our public transport system. I know, we have MRT breakdowns now and again but to be honest, we're definitely lucky. Eastern European public transport isn't terrible, but I could think of a few ways (adapted from our own systems) it could change in order to be more efficient. Nonetheless, I didn't really take public transport everyday because the weather was nice enough for much walking.

In this past month I've seen some seriously ugly sides of human nature. Being in Eastern Europe is the first time I've ever felt like a true minority, especially in less touristy places like Pula, Croatia, where I was the ONLY Asian (in the two days that I was there). Not just oriental Asian but Asian in general. I've realised what different truly means: skin tone, face shape, language, accent. It's definitely something I've never felt back home, or even in New Delhi when I lived there.

It also put into perspective how small Singapore is. People guess that I'm Japanese, Korean, Chinese, Nepali even. But they never ever asked if I'm Singaporean (unless they've been there before and they recognise the accent). I met a girl my age who didn't know what Singapore is and I had to point it out to her on Google maps. I wasn't offended, it just made me realise that our country is so unknown in this part of the world. Perhaps this is what people from Burkina Faso feel when they introduce themselves and where they're from hm. 

At the beginning I was a little offended whenever people walk past me and exclaimed, "ni hao", or "konichiwa" or "ann-yeong" even. Trust me, I got that almost every single day. Of course I've well adapted to it and now my reaction will always be, "hello" along with a nice smile and kindly tell them I'm not from Japan or Korea or China ;) 

I also found out that most people assume that we don't speak English because of how we look. I don't blame them really. It's just another lesson learnt from staying in hostels the entire month. People I've met have told me that if I hadn't spoken to them first, they wouldn't have started the conversation because they don't want me to be embarrassed if I couldn't speak English. I've learnt that I've got to make the first move in introducing myself sometimes.

I've also crossed paths with many, many kind strangers. It's so heartening to have someone you don't know offer to give you a hand with your bags, or directions to your hostel. When I travelled alone in Croatia, I took the bus to get to different cities and all of the bus conductors didn't speak English. Can you sense the panic I was in then? I didn't know when it would be my stop to get off. Thank goodness this uncle in the opposite seat woke me up when the bus turned into the station because I told him where I was headed. Little acts like these make me want to pay it forward. Always be kind because you never know who you can help or whose day you can make better!

Travelling alone: definitely an experience. And also another experience I would probably avoid the next time. It wasn't that I was afraid or worried about my safety because I was alone. I felt safe. It was fun, it really was and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I could wake up and head out whenever I wanted to. I could plan my day according to what I wanted to see at my own pace. I could eat as little as I want or as much as I want. I could allocate the day to anything I feel like doing. 

Here's the catch (and also the main reason why I don't think I'll travel alone again): I couldn't talk to anyone when I wanted to. I'm rather (okay I am) talkative. I need to tell someone when I come across something interesting. In Croatia, it was me myself and I (and my book). Sure, it was nice and relaxing, and I could take in all the sights and sounds every so clearly. But I wish there were people I could share it with. Half the time I was talking to myself (when I was navigating hahahaha). Also, THERE WAS NO ONE TO TAKE PHOTOS FOR ME. Jeez, it was Croatia. It was beautiful!!! But all I could churn out were selfies booooooo. Perhaps when I need a break from people, travelling alone for short periods once in a while isn't too bad. Other than that, I'll relish in some company hahahaha.

Although not exact, what I've written thus far definitely encapsulates what I've been through the past month. I don't think I can ever put into words how blessed I feel to be able to see the parts of the world I travelled to and the lessons I've learnt but I hope this suffices.

I'm very very very thankful. It's only been a month but this is truly the best time of my life and I'll definitely appreciate every moment. Although I still wish I could transport everyone I love here to experience all of this with me!!!

Will be writing about the different cities I've visited in the next few posts so stay tuned!

Sending love from my apartment here in Lisbon. Missing home very much xx